After passing the difficulty of quarter life crisis, we all have that feeling of acceptance on becoming a full pledged adult at 30. We finally tell ourselves, "I'm not really getting any younger." "My life's about to get more seriously serious." "If I fail this time, it will be forever!" How many of you have searched again for your bucket list (written on an old worn out diary...yes millennials actually have handwritten journals) when you were 29 years old and started ticking off each task before reaching your 30th birthday?
"Oh age is just a number. Everything will be the same as I was in my mid-20's!" I bet you told yourself that. But no. A big NO. I've realized a lot of changes when I started being 30 and this time, it is INEVITABLE. Raise your hand, if the following things have occurred to you now and you just want Santa to grant you two more years of being 29.
1. GAINING WEIGHT FASTER
Food becomes crappier for your body at 30's. I was a pro (as I thought I was) at getting fit whenever I want to and decide to. I can eat so much during the Christmas Holidays and it was quite easy for me to slim down by the New Year. Well at 30, even if I reduce my rice intake and skip dinner, I would have expected my weight if not lose, just maintain but it didn't! I was gaining pounds while I was reducing my food consumption.
By this time, you need to work extra hard on both diet and exercise. If before, you visit the gym twice a week. Now, you have to squat that butt off and run like mad at the treadmill for thrice the time you've been seeing that buff trainor.
2. HEALTH SERIOUSLY DETERIORATES
This is in relation to the first problem. All my life, every physical aspect WAS normal and healthy. This is to thank myself for not liking to drink alcohol that much, being a non-smoker, my desire and joy for being fit and eating most of the time in moderation. I just had my annual physical exam last January 2016 and boy I was surprised by the results. ---Cholesterol levels above average---!!! I actually panicked. How could I even get my cholesterol spike higher, when last year all my sisters hear from me is "How I wanted to be a Vegan".
It just didn't sound true. But I came to a reality that eating the same amount of pork and fat at this age, my body can't cope up anymore to dispose them as fast as they can before. Also, your skin doesn't recover and rejuvenate that quickly compared when you were a bubbly flirty twenteen. I've had to stock up with moisturizing night and day creams so I would get (or maintain) the glow and skin firmness I had when I was younger.
One piece of advice: before you take another helping of chicharon (pork fat rind) or overly-buttered steak, think of how you are going to get rid of them from your body.
3. YOU KNOW HOW IT FEELS LIKE TO BE "OLD"
You enter a club dressed like you're 25 (and indeed you still look 25 to people). But there's just this young vibe you can't jive into. "Am I old enough for this stuff?" You try to dance, jump up and down on a rave party and into EDM. But you don't seem that happy and excited anymore. Why are these people look so damn young? Are these people really in their 20s? You know you are too old when you have this inkling feeling of entering a club and you want to warn these kids to go home and advise them to not waste their time and lives to drinking.
I once went for a jog in a Sports Complex and this young guy (who looks like 18) approached and tried to give me his pick up line. Ofcourse it was flattering but I suddenly felt like an old sister to him that I said, "Go home! I am so older than you!" and he replied "I don't care". I was laughing after.
4. DATING D***HEBAGS or D**KS
"The good guys are off the market!" Half of this saying is true. For independent and career-focused women, we thought we can just focus on work cause the "good ones" will be there at the time we want to settle down. Believe me on this when I say it is harder to find a man with the perfect package (I mean not just down there).
Dating in your 20s was all about fun and exploration. Dating in your 30s, "we are down for serious business". Maybe some of us are still down for fun but at the most, we already want to look for a partner for a lifetime. And at this stage, we curse life when we find ourselves in a rut of d**hebag men who continue to play with us while we place our hearts out on their sleeves.
5. WE HATED KIDS BEFORE, BUT NOW YOU WANNA HAVE A BABY
When we were younger, we thought the only thing we could handle to have are boys, clothes and career. If you have younger brothers and sisters who annoys you everyday or those kids in your neighborhood who steals the fruits from your trees, throwing rocks on your window or shout a mean prank to you just to get your attention, then you'll understand why.
At this time of your life, you might have achieved a lot of things and you start to wonder if anyone will be able to inherit what you have worked hard for. You now dream of having your mini-me who will resemble how you dress, how you talk and how you treat other people.
Wanting to have children and getting pregnant at this stage, they say, is the perfect time. The only problem, asides from being single, is not all women are blessed to reproduce children. We are bound into a deadline of a reproduction cycle unlike men who can choose when to have it even at age 60. We're just praying that innovative technology of storing our eggs for future reproduction will get cheaper in time.
6. MISSING OUT ON PRIVILEGES (YOU MIGHT DID NOT KNOW OF)
Like when we reached 13 years old and losing the discounts on airfare and carnival fair entrances as a kid. We wished we could have entered that carnival more or our parents could have taken advantage of a cheaper airfare. At 30, you lose the chance of getting a working holiday visa, apply to be a flight attendant (cause you thought it's the only way you can travel the world for free), or shift to a sales career where companies hire the fresh and the young. I know, it is not too late to start and change careers. But this maybe just for me cause I so want to travel more and a working holiday visa could be the most affordable way to do it.
There are also situations and contests that only allows 30 below somethings like beauty pageants or becoming a Professional Athlete. Isn't it rad that sometimes at this age when we are most confident, that we think we can pass off to be a beauty queen candidate or be an Olympic gold medalist? But hey, I will not kill myself for not being one, but there's some regret in not trying when I was younger.
7. YOU'RE GONNA LOSE FRIENDS
Not only friends but people in general. We begin to notice it since graduating. Our interests change, and so are our friends'. Our friends start to have a family and prefer to spend their time playing and caring for their kids. Our social media news feed is filled with baby photos and wedding pictures.
At this time when we're still single and carefree, our interests may still be the same - travel, fashion, dating, sports but our married girl friends have a new set of interests - cooking, appliances, kids, and discounted nappies and wet wipes. While the guy friends' GFs or wives started to warn them to stop befriending us (even FB unfriending!) because they see us single women as a threat to their relationship. This I am so annoyed at especially if the guy is obviously not my type or unattractive.
The most daunting part is we also lose those people we've had close relationships with (whether we dated, lived or worked with them). These are the people who have cheated on us or have betrayed our trust, and we can no longer keep them in our lives. We want at the most to keep these people but it is unhealthy to do so. We just need to accept the fact that as we lose people, we need to learn to move on and meet new ones.
8. YOU SET YOUR STANDARDS LOWER OR HIGHER
Experience, not just our aspirations, sets our standards. Be it with food, accommodation, work, lifestyle, friends and, most of all, in choosing who we date. We're done with sleeping in bunk beds and double deckers, pay extra to get out of an economy seat, take a pass on a free General Admission concert ticket, or sacrifice a few pennies to get a cab than queue on a chaotic train ride. We've had enough relationships and met several men that leave us with a reminder to choose better if not get someone at par. We've done more work in getting ourselves at our best that we choose not to settle for less.
For others, it may be the opposite. They set their standards lower because of pressure and panic of not achieving their dreams on time. I've seen women settle down with their partners they truly do not want. I've seen women get themselves pregnant regardless if unsupported by their man just because they already want a child. I've seen talented women underemployed and stopped utilizing their amazing skills, because money is the only thing they need more for material things, and not a fruitful fulfilling career.
9. DECLARING ONESELF 29 FOREVER!
It is a constant first that when someone asks me about how old I am, I give a long pause and think about if I'm going to tell the truth. I actually turned 31 last two months and stopped counting my age! I started this article when I was 30 and unable to finish it. Though I am still able to date younger men than me and they don't really care the few years gap between our ages, I still cringe at the thought that I am 31!
We're all shaken at this age to reassess where we are, what we want, and who we finally want to be. We might have regrets on things we weren't able to do, and regrets on people we have quarreled with and lost over time. Fear not! Feel like being 30+ is a whole new stage to explore to. It will be more liberating, exciting and definitely harder. And everything you do and your destiny boils down to you and you alone.###
Have I missed anything? I would love to here you share your thoughts on the comments section below.
